Everyone wants to live a happy life. A contented life where they are relaxed and satisfied at all times. We work hard to make sure we achieve the degree of pleasure and peace that we really want. But sometimes, nothing seems to be making you feel better. Sometimes, it feels as if you cannot do anything to satisfy yourself or anyone around you. So what is it exactly that is standing between you and a happy, healthy life?
Most of the times the one thing that stops you from building your house of happiness is, surprisingly, you. That’s right. There might be certain aspects of your personality or certain beliefs and practices of yours that may be posing as obstacles in your path towards serenity, causing you to tumble and trip, and give up on your ambition of felicity. Here are a few factors that might be your obstacles, and a few ways you can tackle and eliminate them.
Anger is a natural emotion that arises when your mind perceives a threat. It is a way for your body to respond naturally to something that is against your wishes. Now, it is okay to feel angry at times and it is even important to let it all out from time to time. But not always is it a rational choice. Getting irritated at every little thing can be one of the greatest factors in ruining relationships and disturbing a calm environment. Anger can turn even the kindest man on the planet into the Incredible Hulk! And in the heat of the moment, you might even end up doing something you will regret for the rest of your life. So every time you feel the familiar heat of a flame growing in the pit of your stomach, do something to put it out. Breathing exercises, counting to ten, punching a pillow might sound like cliches but greatly help in reducing the immediate intensity of the emotion.
Also read: Anger Management Tips
Not everything in life goes as you plan it to. There will definitely be a few opportunities that you will have missed due to one reason or the other. A few relationships that you might have not been able to save. Or some mistakes would have made that you would trade your soul to undo. All these shots that missed the target tend to bring about feelings of remorse and sorrow. But dwelling on the past brings nothing good. It only makes you further miss out on upcoming opportunities.
Harsh things happen to everyone in the world. Things that may seem unfair do not deserve to happen to you. But in reality, accidents don’t come looking for deserving people. They arrive whenever and wherever can affect anyone. Blaming nature and other people and not doing anything to better and improve your life yourself is a very negative thing to do and will only serve to hold you back. Instead, be proactive and take the bull by the horns. You are not the victim; you are the hero of your own story!
Sometimes you picture something in your mind before you actually do it. If it turns out exactly how you wanted it after its done: great! If not, it does not mean everything is horrible. Where aiming for perfection can reap you quality results at times, it can also be a blow to one’s self-esteem and confidence if things don’t turn out the way you desired. So, always strive for the best but don’t be disheartened to the extent that you stop feeling joy in the activities you used to do. Learn to settle!
In order to achieve happiness in its truest form, it is necessary to let go of things that are temporary and worldly. Our society’s obsession with superficial things like having loads of money, a huge mansion to live in and a perfect outlook, is poisonous. To be truly happy with your life, you need to be happy with yourself and whatever you have. You should never feel as if you are inadequate or what you have isn’t enough. Instead of building palaces in your dreams, picture a perfect life right here, where you are right now.
Jealousy and Envy:
Your neighbour has a Bugatti you’d really like to drive, your friend owns a walk in closet, and your friend apparently got the perfect 6 pack. And you, my friend, are getting trapped in a fog of jealous and envy. You look at those above of you, and you will always find something that you don’t have and begin to feel down. Nothing will feel good in your life if you keep thinking ‘others have it better’. Instead of looking at what you don’t have, look at what you do. Count the beautiful things you’ve been blessed with; maybe a loving husband, beautiful kids, or an exceptional brain!
One thing to always remember is that learning to love and be happy with your life is a gradual process. It takes time for things to reach a point where you can accept them. It is important to allow things to work themselves out instead of trying to force them to change overnight. Such impatience will only cause you to be let down. So, instead of purposely sacrificing your happiness, be prepared to try hard and work even harder for the life that you want to live.
There is no standard for a happy life. A happy life is one where you feel like you wouldn’t have it any other way. By eliminating all the mentioned negative factors from your practice, you will soon find yourself enjoying the little things that you used to find irritating. Like Norman Vincent Peale has said,
“Stand up to your obstacles and do something about them. You will find that they haven’t half the strength you think they have.”